The Shack

My church that I attend has their own library so after having a cup of coffee, I was admiring the lovely books that was out. A lot of people told me that the shack was a good read. So I took that book out. I have just finished it this morning, I started it on the bank holiday Monday. As I got an exam today I had to leave my book downstairs otherwise I would not get my nine hours sleep otherwise I would finished it yesterday evening!

I enjoyed reading it, that's for sure. It brought me to tears. Though reading the shack for theology point of perspective I don't like it. It's very poor. From what I understand from the book, that bad things happens because God created a freewill. So it is our own fault things happen? Or is just life being chaotic and random? I notice in my life when bad things happen, I get closer to God than ever not by praying and resent it to God. having bad things happen in life make you stronger. Cliched as it sounds, I believe that.

If this book wasn't recommended by my church congregation, the chances are I would give up reading. The entire beginning of the book bored me. I had to make endless cups of tea just so I could read it. Though after I got through the beginning it changing from being boring very thrilling because there were interesting things going on, When it came together at the end, I did have a greater appreciation of the way plot elements came together, but most of the time thought certain components of the story weren't very well done.

I re-read one paragraph where the author uses nine similes! Two of them concern tears and are in the same sentence. Someone please sit this author down and explain that similes and metaphors are to open windows. We don't need an entire glass factory delivered to us every page. (You can tell I have an English exam, can't you?

Please hear me out with these three paragraphs.

Aside from the cursing, I couldn’t believe it when members of the Trinity began to appear to the main character as black women.  Don’t get me wrong, this isn’t about race, it is about gender and the representation of God.

Representing God the Father as any image or human is a serious error even in fiction. We are not to build an image in our minds of God--we cannot "reduce" Him to our level of comprehension as He is so far above us in all things. Jesus had to die a painful death to reconcile us as sinful humans to God the Father due to His holiness. Jesus is the bridge and mediator, we cannot approach God apart from Him, let alone misrepresent Him in this careless way.

Why represent God as a woman? The Bible makes it clear that the authority structure is for a man to be at the head. The Shack is more dangerous because it feeds society's attempts to undermine the biblical gender roles and provides direct support for the feminist agenda. Christians should be standing against cultural trends where they conflict with the Bible, not promoting and supporting them.

I was very annoyed and frustrated by the profanity and don’t think it's ever okay for a Christian to swear or use blasphemy in their books whether fiction or non-fiction

We need to remember that it is the broad way that leads to destruction and the narrow way to life. In the latter times, people will gather teachers that say what their itching ears want to hear and we are warned that many will be deceived. The popular way is not God's way. Simply put in this modification of a quotation from G. K. Chesterton,

Wrong is wrong even if everyone else is doing it. Right is right even if no one else is doing it

The manifesto on how to be interesting

My recent trip to the library I picked this book as I previously read Holly Bounre "Am I normal yet" I thoroughly enjoyed that so thought I might enjoy this one. And I certainly did, it's one of those pick where each teenager can relate to and a book you cannot you put down. Thank goodness I don't own a book light otherwise I would have no sleep for serveral nights. Though my next treat I might just buy one. So I don't have to turn the light on and off which is another great way to get those 10,000 step a day.

Apparently I'm boring. A nobody. But that's all about to change because I am starting a project. Here. Now. For myself. And if you want to come along for the ride then you're very welcome.

Bree is a lose, a wannabe author who hides behind words. Most of the time she hates she her life, her school, her never-there parents. So she writes.

But when she's told she needs to start living a life worth writing about, The manifesto on How to Be Interesting. Six steps that will see her infiltrate the popular set, fall in love with someone forbidden and make the biggest mistake of her life.

Sometimes books have impressions on you. Sometimes you read something which is so raw and real that when you finally, finally finish it you have to put it down and just sit there for a few minutes, letting it all sink in. This is one of those books.

The Manifesto On how To be Interesting begins with the life of Bree, a rich teenage girl who could be pretty if she wanted but chooses not to be. She is close friends with geeky Holdo and doesn't seem to care about her social reputation; all she wants is to be a published author. However there is a near constant stream of rejection letters and, doubting her skills immensely, she turns to her English teacher and close confident for help; he tells her no uncertain terms that her current life is boring which is why all her writing is boring, too. What experience is she supposed to write from is she has none? And thus the story begins.

"What' my purpose? I'm going to become interesting. I'm going to become somebody you want to read to about." Chapter 6

Usually if I don't like the main character I will not like the book, especially if it's one which delves so deeply into Bree's psyche. What's interesting about the way Bourne characterises her lead is that she's written to be unlikeable-we are supposed to read the book and slowly let her become a sour taste in our mouth. That's the point. And it works, it absolutely works. Bree is a character you will love to hate because she's real and she's flawed and she makes mistakes so many of us to but are too scared to admit to. She falls into the traps of vapidity and seeking revenge and manipulates those around her so easily. It almost feels unreal. Is she any better than the stuck up bitches she gores tow to two with? That's for you to question.

No fear, though Bree is not only the flashed out character in this beautiful world of lifelikable people. Plenty of the other characters have depths I did not see coming and intricacies to their lives which were not expected. It's not a black and white tale, easy to categorise the people within in. It's very complex and ambiguous and draws upon the realties of all humans. Even the most shallow of people are human underneath.

"I'm terrified that my journey won't tie up all the loose ends nicely. Because this a life, not just a story, and life doesn't always go the way stories tell you."

So, whilst working her way up the social ladder through means of make overs, rare lipsticks, and interesting new stockings, Bree infiltrates the mean girl posse of her school. It's not an easy fete and I was glad to see not all of the girls were enamoured with her as Jasmine first was. Whilst on many levels it really was quite simply executed there were always ongoing nicks that separated Bree from the other girls and likewise. Blogging about their exploits as she uncovered the truth about what it meant to be 'interesting' (aka popular), Bree enacts a quest to bring down the Queen Bree.

 And yet, though a lot of her time seemingly filed with lying her way to the top of the social chain, she still has time to run the Creative Writing club with her favourite teacher. The reader is very quickly introduced to the idea of Bree and Mr. Fellows as a romantic pairing but their romance doesn't actually develop until a later on. If I'm honest it's actually aa little.....of putting. I don't quite se the need for it. Whilst I recognise the implications of Bree caring for him, the reciprocal feelings were not necessary to the overarching themes of the novel. It would have made me far more comfortable as a reader for this to have been axed.

"If we were more interesting, we would be having sex right now. (...) They should be having sex! That's what people cared about. That's what interesting people did. (...) If she and Holdo ended up sleeping together tonight that would be a very interesting thing to have happened!." Chapter 5

In a similar vein I felt that Bourne slightly neglected the friendship between Holdo and Bree. I thought he might be her respite, I thought she might indulge him in her experiment, let him know what was happening, but I was wrong. Neither the big reunion scene or the interesting parallels I expected to be drawn happened. Not in the way I wanted or anticipated, anyway. I think Holdo could've been utilised more as an antithesis to the others.

What did work exceedingly well was the inclusion of self harm. It's constantly important to discuss serious issues like these within YA novels particularly and I'm glad that Bourne is so driven to include mental health in her works. What I like about it in The Manifesto, though, was that it was rather low key. I'd like to make it clear that this is not a book about self harm but its a by-product of how Bree reacts to the events of the novel. It is by no means a focal point of the story but it's not sugar coated either.

Ultimately I loved this novel. The themes it explored, the characters, all of it rolled into a story I just couldn't put down. With each book I read by Holly Bourne I become more convinced that she is one of the most important YA writes of the age. It's impossible to read Bourne's writing and not come out on the other side a changed person. This book will change you.

Just feeling creative

Where I belong

I read two books in four days one of them is called where I belong by Catherine Ryan Hyde which is what I am going to write about as it was such a good book. The other book was called the year with the rat by  Clare Furniss which is another good book. Though I got some outstanding assignments to do, really push my limit here with time. Though I thought I would make an excuse to post something.

Imagine being 14 year old with a 7 year old sister on the Autism Spectrum and at-the-end-of-her-rope mother who cannot cope. No father. He beat feet when he found out just how affected his daughter Sophie was by the Autism. Very. Sophie does not talk, seems to pay no heed to what it said to her, makes no eye contact with others and screeches incessantly, for hours on end, which forces the family to be asked to leave place after place. They finally land with a sister of a grandmother who is recently widowed. But Sophie's screaming becomes intolerable and she asks them to leave. Now, with nowhere to go, and no money, they are homeless.

Can you imagine this life?

Imagine that the fate of this family is constantly falling on your young shoulders.

But before they have to leave Aunt Vi's house, Sophie falls in love with a great Dane who belongs to the next door neighbour, a grouchy curmudgeon singly guy only 7 weeks away from retirement as a bank officer. When around the dog, Sophie is silent, and learns that the dog comes and goes and is silent waiting for his next appearance.

When the man retires and moves to a house several hours away in the mountains, Sophie has a complete meltdown, thereby causing the family to have abrupt heave-ho from their temporary home. With almost no money, to nowhere else to turn, the mother has the idea of following the man to his new town and getting the teen's dog walking job back so Sophie can see his dog again and perhaps settled down once again.

It is a story of a family struggling to stay together without having to resort to a 'placing' Sophie in a home. It shows you what happens when you are out of options, money and hope.

A wonder read. Really!!

Another book review

See friends, relatives and readers. I do read.

Not to sure if you know. Nearly half of 17 years olds say they read for pleasure no more than one or more times a year-if that. That's way down from a decade ago. Yep that is not me. You would always find me reading or within hand reach of a book. Despite the up rise of technology which makes it so easy to find a book and read best off all some books are free despite that teenagers don't read for pleasure. Though it is surprising or to me anyhow, the teenagers spend most of the time on their gadget but still don't find time to read. Well least's you know now!

Smashing physics

The discovery of the Higgs boson made headlines around the world. Two scientists, Peter Higgs and François Englert, whose theories predicted its existence, shared a Nobel Prize. The discovery was the culmination of the largest experiment ever run, the ATLAS and CMS experiments at CERN's Large Hadron Collider.

But what really is a Higgs boson and what does it do? How was it found? And how has its discovery changed our understanding of the fundamental laws of nature? And what did it feel like to be part of it?

Jon Butterworth is one of the leading physicists at CERN and this book is the first popular inside account of the hunt for the Higgs. It is a story of incredible scientific collaboration, inspiring technological innovation and ground-breaking science. It is also the story of what happens when the world's most expensive experiment blows up, of neutrinos that may or may not travel faster than light, and the reality of life in an underground bunker in Switzerland.

This book will also leave you with a working knowledge of the new physics and what the discovery of the Higgs particle means for how we define the laws of nature. It will take you to the cutting edge of modern scientific thinking

Maybe I should a wrap up book review! Maybe at the end of the month I will give you an update of what I have read and a little review. Well least I have another excuse to blog.

Right those assignments are getting done quickly than participated. Who knew that blogging makes you worker faster when doing assignments. Though I still got my life stages one to do. So please excuse me. However if you want to look at what I have done about is inheritance really in all in our genes?

The art of being normal

Well two post in one day! Wow more surprising two assignments coming to a third and two post. How did that happen?

This post is a book review it's not going to tell you how to be normal.

There are many young adult writers who stick to what they know. Churning out novel after novel, they dabble in love triangles, "tough life choices", white protagonists, and occasionally, throw in vampires to spice things up a little. You buy their books with the knowledge that you'll receive romance that tries too hard, pretentious metaphors and the mangling of the traditions of different ethnicities and places. Lisa Williamson writes without grace, has a whole host of bland characters and relies on the confused, problematic idea of a strict social hierarchy in secondary school. But man, does Lisa Williamson have guts. It takes guts, to write this kind of book. In this accepting, liberal day and age, it still takes some gumption to write a book about trans teenagers. For that, I applaud her.

So, without further ado, let's talk about The Art of Being Normal.

David and Leo are two very different boys, David from a stereotypical middle class family, with loving parents and an annoying little sister. His life, in short, is normal – apart from the fact that all he wants in the world is to have been born a girl. Throughout the book, this remains his defining feature, although there are several aspects of his personality left ambiguous for the reader, which could be further explored and deepened. Leo is from a lower class background, with a broken family, an abusive mother and a twin who couldn't be more different to him. And a note here, Leo's personality is far more complex and interesting than David's, who seems to be one of the blandest characters I've ever encountered. When Leo moves to Daniel's nice, well-maintained school… shall we take a wild guess? Daniel's life gets turned upside down. And I have a feeling that my sarcastic italics won't show up on the website so let me tell you now, that last line was in the most sarcastic, most ironic of italics.

Together, the boys try to find the secret in Leo's sad past, overcome heartbreak, help David talk to his parents about his wishes, and become the best of friends. The most interesting, and politically apt aspect of all this is by far the situation in Leo's home, a council housing flat which he is ashamed to admit he lives in, and the sharpest conversations, the vignettes which make this book worth reading are almost always regarding how he feels about his social class and about his family situation. His own problems are made more complex by his background, creating a richer storyline and strengthening the plot. Leo's life really is the book's saving grace, as the blasé ending, combined with David's cutout personality, make for tedious reading.

I'm saddened in a way, I suppose. Whenever a YA writer decides to discuss a controversial topic or way of being in their books, I always get ridiculously excited, hoping for some kind of ground-breaking novel. And of course, I'm almost always disappointed. When I read the first few pages of The Art of Being Normal, I had such faith! This would not be another book about finding yourself! This would not follow the long line of Perks of Being a Wallflower wannabes, it would be about justice, about struggle, about… who knows? Who knows what I want from coming of age novels? I've read so many that they've started to meld together, and hardly any of them are anything special. But The Art of Being Normal lacks stylistic polish and depth, to the extent that it becomes slightly boring, a little banal.

So, now let me turn around and say without shame, that you wouldn't do badly if you were to buy this book. I know exactly how hypocritical that sounds, but hear me out. In primary school, you get gold stickers for trying. And Williamson has tried, has tried so hard. This is the first YA novel I've read with trans protagonists and in depth discussion of gender change, and that in itself is important. The fact that she has representation, some political commentary and the occasional well-written line is more than many YA books out there can offer, something which is impressive in its own right. Don't buy the book looking for exquisite prose and a marvellous story line. But buy it for some light entertainment, for a quick read with some points to think about. This is a author who has thought about what their readers should be exposed to. And that in itself deserves a gold star.

Book after book

Last week has been busy doing assignments but still managed to fine time to read three classics. I do not normally read classics but I managed to get stuck in. I don't normally review a book but since a lot of my friends ask me 'How was this book' I might as well give a try to review a book.

Deep breath. Here the journey commence. Oh just a bump over here this review might contain spoilers. So read if you wish if not read the book then read my review even leave a comment.

First book

I read this book back in August and fancied re-reading it again.

'This story is a lasting one with characters that are remembered long after the last page is read' There was never a story so historically accurate and yet so immersed in its character's own lives as Harper Lee's To Kill a Mockingbird. Set in the American South, Alabama, Lee masterfully spins a tale of prejudice and ignorance of equality through the young yet intelligent eyes of a little girl, our central character, Scout Finch. "Shoot all the blue jays you want, if you can hit 'em, but remember 'This story is a lasting one with characters that are remembered long after the last page is read' There was never a story so historically accurate and yet so immersed in its character's own lives as Harper Lee's To Kill a Mockingbird. Set in the American South, Alabama, Lee masterfully spins a tale of prejudice and ignorance of equality through the young yet intelligent eyes of a little girl, our central character, Scout Finch. "Shoot all the blue jays you want, if you can hit 'em, but remember it's a sin to kill a mockingbird" – a lawyer's advice to his children while he defends the real mockingbird in this story, Tom Robinson, a black man accused of raping a white girl. In the time of the Great Depression when rights for black people had only just been won, the odds are cruelly turned against Tom and his lawyer Atticus Finch. But inequality is everywhere, not just in court. Seen and heard by Scout and her brother Jem in their very own neighbourhood in Maycomb, hidden in snide comments and everyday actions. Family name, colour, race, background – all values that the adults of Maycomb hold so dear. It only takes a child with an open mind to see how very wrong they are. The characters in To Kill a Mockingbird are vividly drawn to build an entire world. The beliefs and faults of the Deep South in the thirties are humorous and yet not only make the reader think, but teach them of how people used to think of race in the past, and how foolish this way of thinking was. Harper Lee uses fiction to show what real courage is, not "a man with a gun in his hand" but "when you know you're licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what". Although the lengthy and detailed descriptions of the characteristics and habits of Maycomb County and its residents may seem a little unnecessary or stilted, this is what makes the small town seem like an entire world to the reader and also, later on in the book, the reader will be sure to come to the realisation that a lot of these characteristics and habits are the product of prejudice. Boo Radley will seem quite a significant mystery towards the start of the story, a never-heard-of man who stays locked up in his house, never seen by his neighbours. However, once the major events of the trial and several other happenings occur, the reader, as well as the characters in the story, Jem and Scout, will come to know that Boo Radley is a perfect example of the effects of judgment based on race, family and colour. Lee uses a perfect blend of character, mystery and history to portray the past as accurately and honestly as a classic such as this could. This story is a lasting one with characters that are remembered long after the last page is read. A touching book, simply for being so remarkably real Second book 'I felt rather lonely after the March sisters had gone as I loved their spirit and felt as if I was almost one of them, which is a clear sign of this book's greatness' Four sisters: Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy March, are part of a poor but loving family. With their father off to war they have only their mother left to encourage them to be the best version of themselves at all times. As they go through love and loss they truly do learn to become 'little women'. I found myself, after reading the last line 'I felt rather lonely after the March sisters had gone as I loved their spirit and felt as if I was almost one of them, which is a clear sign of this book's greatness' Four sisters: Meg, Jo, Beth and Amy March, are part of a poor but loving family. With their father off to war they have only their mother left to encourage them to be the best version of themselves at all times. As they go through love and loss they truly do learn to become 'little women'. I found myself, after reading the last line twice over just to check, satisfied yet in want of more. It was a refreshing read that made me care for the sisters and left me wanting to know what led Alcott to write this simple masterpiece. As all well-known books do, it had a fair few morals that, although made the characters seem a bit too perfect to be real, were reasonable and made me want to make up for my faults (of which there are many). Alcott's writing was elegant yet poignant and haunting at moments, and perfect for the era it was set in, whilst the sister's personalities were intricately described throughout the whole book. It gave you a sense of what it was like to be a normal family in the 1800's and subtly showed the feelings of each character. However, I have a few complaints. I a lot of my friends read this book and found themselves scanning the book and not actually reading it at times and reading other books because of its slow plot. There aren't many exciting events to keep the reader hooked throughout. I also at times found the characters annoyingly perfect and would have liked just a couple more arguments. All in all though, I felt rather lonely after the March sisters had gone as I loved their spirit and felt as if I was almost one of them, which is a clear sign of this book's greatness. I know I will remember this book for years to come and it will always feel as if it were almost yesterday that I read it, as it is a book to treasure and keep on a dusty bookshelf to pass on for generations Third book I was surprised by how much I liked Wuthering Heights because I didn’t agree with some of the assumptions, felt lost in the class-related themes, and didn’t especially like any of the characters. But something about this class still had me reading compulsively. This is a book that speaks to the death of romantic notions; even the relatively happy ending doesn’t seem to come from a grand love or fiery romance, but from quiet acceptance. The only (presumably) successful relationship doesn’t start i I was surprised by how much I liked Wuthering Heights because I didn’t agree with some of the assumptions, felt lost in the class-related themes, and didn’t especially like any of the characters. But something about this class still had me reading compulsively. This is a book that speaks to the death of romantic notions; even the relatively happy ending doesn’t seem to come from a grand love or fiery romance, but from quiet acceptance. The only (presumably) successful relationship doesn’t start in secret and it is never dramatic; it is a quiet acclimatization of two people towards one another, a co-evolution. To me, in many ways, Wuthering Heights was an anti-romance, exactly the opposite of what I had been expecting. The plot follows the relationship between a well-to-do country girl, Catherine, and the orphan boy, Heathcliff, taken in by her father and how their relationship affects everyone in their influence over a generation. Catherine marries a boy closer to her station and Heathcliff’s life then becomes one of proving himself and of illustrating the error of his loved one’s ways. It does not go well, not for anyone. This, of course, makes for an excellent tale. Even as I was wrapped up in the story, I struggled with how unsympathetic all of the characters were. They were foolish, naive, vindictive, whiny, and self-absorbed. They were, I suppose, very human, though in some cases it was hard to see anything redeemable about them at all. Take Catherine, the beloved whose rejection of Heathcliff spurs the book’s events. She had a singularly high sense of self-worth: "But I begin to fancy you don’t like me. How strange! I thought, though everybody hated and despised each other, they could not avoid loving me. And they have all turned to enemies in a few hours: they have, I’m positive; the people here." And then there is Heathcliff, the central character of the book, the one woven into the cultural fabric, whom I thought I knew before reading a single page. Turns out I was wrong. My very first thought as I got into the book was one of utter disbelief: This is the Heathcliff that is supposed to be a sex symbol? I mean, somehow, that was my expectation before I cracked the spine. I expected Heathcliff to be dark and troubled and romantic and dreamy. Instead, he was possessive, controlling, and manipulative. Not to mention a little crazy by the end. Heathcliff is the kind of boyfriend who blames you for his unhappiness and reminds you over and over that he would die if you left him. He was a selfish ass, albeit one whose unpleasantness may be the result of a hard-knock life. Sure, maybe Edgar Linton isn’t the kind of guy to get a girl all hot and bothered, but his love is as intense and enduring as Heathcliff’s. And way less creepy. A contextual disclaimer: I say this as someone who almost always falls for the dark, troubled, morally ambiguous characters. (Now, cast Johnny Depp in the role and I might have to reconsider.) Heathcliff does serve as an excellent reminder of the pitfalls of pride. So much of the tragedy in Wuthering Heights comes from pride. We see the deadliness of this particular sin, as people choose misery and inaction over the potential of humiliation. It is this part of the characters I most related to, in spite of the fact that it often made them so very unlikable. As Ellen Dean tells a young Heathcliff, “proud people breed sad sorrows for themselves.” It was Ellen Dean whom I came closest to liking. In many ways, this is her story far more than Heathcliff’s or Catherine’s or Lockwood’s. Sometimes, I was frustrated by Dean’s inability to see that she was making the same mistakes over and over, and her lack of imagination when it came to potential consequences. But as our guide to the world of the Grange and the Heights and the moors, she was engaging, even as her dangerously Pollyanna-ish tendencies were frustrating. Even she saw her mistakes, her role in the story’s tragedy: "I seated myself on a chair, and rocked to and fro, passing harsh judgment on my many derelictions of duty; from which, it struck me then, all the misfortunes of my employers sprang. It was not the case in reality, I am aware; but it was, in my imagination, that dismal night; and I thought Heathcliff himself less guilty than I." Over and over, Dean justified the bad behaviour of others, or imagined that this time everything would be decorous and proper. Perhaps, it is decorum and propriety that are to blame for Dean’s powerlessness. The constraints of class and station are very foreign to me as a modern, middle class, Western reader. When I read books where the star-crossedness comes from class distinction, I often wonder what today’s equivalent would be. Is there one? In this culture so obsessed with independence and free will, it seems almost certain that Catherine and Heathcliff would indulge their passion, that Catherine would not choose Edgar simply because Heathcliff is below her. Even then, though, I imagine the relationship as something doomed. To me, the tragedy here lies in the flaws of the characters rather than in society’s oppressions and circumstance’s cruelties. I concede there are many other ways to read this book. That plurality appeals to me. The text supports so many interpretations, any number of focal points. I have, for instance, nothing to say about Lockwood or Joseph (although that may be because I could barely manage to interpret his accented words). If Bronte had written a simple story, with clear heroes and villains and moral lessons laid bare, would the book have withstood the test of time the way this one has? Or would it become dated and empty as mores shifted? How differently I must read this book than a 19th-century reader would have. Finally, a word or two about madness: It is interesting the way the book conflates madness and illness while at the same time casting a moral judgment on the sufferers of both. Sickliness is a shorthand character trait in this book and madness a character flaw. Again, this attitude is likely a product of the book’s era, but it’s one that I found intriguing because of the inherent contradictions I see in the way it was handled. In its own way, Wuthering Heights is a perfect read for a long weekend. It is a novel about what happens when the guy doesn’t get the girl and how the universe can be set right again. In between, there is melodrama, tragedy, madness and, possibly, ghosts. It’s a quick read, a fun one, and the kind of book that gives you a little bit of insight into the stew of popular culture. Plus, it’ll make you feel good about yourself, since you’re almost certainly wiser, more humble, and less shallow than any of Bronte’s classic characters. That is all my three classics though my book that I just finished today ish. Was not a classic but thought you might want to read what I thought of it. This book was easy for me to read though my friend no shame and name here found it hard to read. And that what makes it so brilliant. Holly Bourne takes the somewhat prohibited subject of mental health and reveals it to us in its messy, flawed, heart-breaking existence in an eye-opening, harrowing account of a girl's battle with Obsessive Compulsive Disorder and Generalized Anxiety Disorder. I loved this book. So much. I was basically a squealing, flailing, sobbing mess with a happy heart but tears dancing across my cheeks due to one of the most beautiful YA literary experiences I've had in a while. Even now a day passed, my feelings for this book haven't dimmed in the slightest - in fact, they've grown. I literally can't stop thinking about this book, about the characters, the writing and the truth it speaks. I'm in love with Am I Normal Yet? and I'm sure you will be too. I think I'll begin with how much I adore the characters. My own diorders hasn't been that great lately and especially at the time of writing this review and it makes me so badly wish that I could call up Evie and speak to them as well Amber and Lottie who I would love to have a friendship with. The characters feel so real and I LOVE THEM SO MUCH. I loved Evie. She was so relatable and so honest with us about her struggle. She felt like a breathing, existing person - every character did! It feels like they're out there, living in the real world and to say anything else would be sacrilege. I loved Evie, she was funny, she was thoughtful, she tried to get better, she tried hiding her illness not only so she could continue trying to live society's idea of normal to protect herself from the hatred of the world and the disappointment of those close to her. I also thought Holly Bourne tackled the thoughts people with mental illness are bombarded with superbly well. The bitterness and the self-loathing and the desire to be "normal"whilst then further discussing the topic of what is normal anyway? Evie's also slightly naive which is understandable as she hasn't been on the social scene for three years. She was mistreated and left feeling helpless and foolish several times due to dating and I felt so sorry for her but I liked that that too was realistic. I liked that Holly Bourne showed dating in it's awkward and often disappointing glory. YA books tend to have unrealistic dating scenarios and I loved how this book showed that dating isn't always picture perfect and, especially when you're sixteen, it can be disappointing, it can be awkward and it make things worse instead of better. I felt like I was learning along with Evie and drinking up life lessons with her. This book taught me so much about life, love and anxiety and I can't thank Holly Bourne enough for giving me this opportunity to be enlightened about so many important areas. I loved Evie's friends Amber and Lottie! I loved Amber and how passionate she was about feminism. She's strong-willed and determined but she's also vulnerable and self-conscious and I liked how the author balanced those qualities out. I really liked Lottie too. She was intelligent and she knew it and didn't allow herself to dumb herself down for guys like many people do. I adored Evie's little sister, Rose. She was so supportive and wise and I loved her! I also liked how Bourne showed that Rose also had problems to deal with and that everyone, no matter how fine and lovely they may appear, is dealing with something. Then there were the three love interests scattered throughout the book (don't worry, there wasn't a love triangle/square thing). Guy was a total jerk and I thought maybe he had some redeeming qualities after the party where he helped Evie but I don't think he could ever fully redeem himself due to his weed/smoking habit. I never liked him though and my dislike for him just grew throughout the book. Ethan…I laugh just thinking about him. He was a character, that's for sure. Oli! I LOVE OLI. I want a book from Oli's perspective so badly I really hope Oli features in the sequels because I love his adorableness so much. Evie, Amber and Lottie are really there for each other, always uplifting, supporting and empowering each other even if one engages in activities that they don't agree with. I loved how this book showed the meaning of true friendship - of accepting and loving someone despite their flaws. I also love how it showed that relationships can be fickle and fleeting but a sturdy friendship can withstand the tests of time. I loved how it showed that if someone accepts you completely despite the panic attacks and the irrational fears they're someone worth fighting for. The plot was great too. I flew through the book (when I wasn't taking a minute to remind myself that I wasn't Evie because it literally felt like we, the reader, are submerged in Evie's thoughts) and it was an addictive read. I appreciated the honesty in which it showed the tiring, pointless fight between logic and irrationality and the treacherous climb it takes to reach the cusp of "normality". The cusp of full recovery and the quickening downward spiral as you lose your footing, falling to the bottom of the mountain and have to repeat the slow, exhausting climb once again to reach the person you used to be - but this time you're weighed down by the baggage of doubt and crippling fear that you won't be able to stitch your fragmented self back together again. This struggle was depicted with such heart-rendering candor it quite frankly had me sobbing because Holly made me understand, she made me live Evie's struggle and it was jarring but I'm so thankful for that. That she provided me with the unflinching truth that will help me understand the world and it's people slightly more. I also appreciated that Holly Bourne didn't romanticize mental health. Nothing could heal Evie miraculously and Holly made it quite clear in the book that Evie would have to keep working at it. The recovery process was so genuine that I...I don't actually have words it was just utterly PERFECT. It highlights the fact that it's a constant effort to get better and then you will have a relapse along the way, it's inevitable, and then you'll have to keep working at it to get back to where you used to be. It's frustrating and it's exhausting and Holly emphasized that truth. So many books write a romance that fixes the protagonist's problems and I may have screamed with joy that this book didn't have that. Sure, I adore a love story that fixes all of life's problems and where the couple ride off into the sunset on a white horse and live happily ever after as much as the next girl, but as much as we want that to happen, it doesn't. This book shows that not all guys are going to be Augustus Waters or Tobias or Will Herondale, they're not going to whisper poetry into your ear when you're crying, or be by your side day and night, or profess their love for you under a moonlit sky. Sometimes the guys want to take advantage of you, a lot of the time they smoke, drink, sleep around and do drugs and a lot of time they won't be as supportive as you would like if you say you have a mental illness. I mean, of course that's not always the case, but generally speaking. This book portrayed relationships honestly and showed how they can muddy the waters and complicate things instead of making things better and I applaud that. The writing was excellent too! I love how it's a running commentary on Evie's thoughts. You're basically in her head and that is quite a terrifying and uncomfortable place to be but that just once again proves Holly's extraordinary talent to expose the blatant truth of how catastrophic it is to live with a mental illness. It was excellent. Am I Normal Yet? was an extraordinary novel that left me reeling. It was a harrowing, hopeful account of one girl's struggle with a mental illness and her determination to overcome it. I haven't felt this much reading a book in awhile, it tore at my heart and freed the tears that threatened to spill...but it also attached wings to my heart and made it soar as the undercurrent of hope and strength grew as I turned the pages. Holly Bourne wrote this book with such honesty. So many sentiments Am I Normal Yet? held were thoughts that had echoed mine before and that just proves how brilliant this book is. If you want a book that will make you understand the world, understand yourself and leave you mind-blown, read this. Truly a stellar read. Watch this space for more reviews, I am on GoodReads if you are interested in that thing. still finding my feet on the website though. Now if you excuse me, I am going to start to read my second book today 'the art of being normal'