Wednesday, 19 August 2015

Inside An Addiction

What I feel they may never understand,
it's not like its difficult or hard to comprehend.

But it's what lies behind my every pull,
I've done it so much sometimes I don't even know.

Where'd it all go wrong,
Did someone curse that day.
Little did I know it would take my everything away.

My love, my joy, my truth, my hope,
the day I began you, I blindly signed that oath.
The oath that strangles and tears me apart,
ripping piece by piece, till there's nothing but my heart.

The heart that feels every single thing, no mouth to use,
nothing but sting.

When people look at me, what do they see?
a girl? a friend? a masterpiece?

Knitted together with letdowns and lies,
hiding inside feelings continue to rise.

But my! that masterpiece, look but do not touch!
You can care about the outside,
but isn't that enough?

Well no one likes and undercover mess,
so I just stay right here...
and try to live my 'best'.

I have an an disorder that I am battling again and just want to rant it out what I was feeling then out of no where this came out of the blue. It surprises me that people look on the outside than them middle. I just kind of wrote this starting off on my disorder and how it's more than just pulling out hair then I just kind of ran with that into I don't know. Comments would be nice though! I wanna hear what it make YOU feel!

This wasn't the poem that I was going to do for today. So last week you had two poems and said don't get used to do it. Remember that? Guess what? You again would get another poem. 


Where do I start
I reach to grab something
but I can't start without finishing 
can't start if I don't know how to finish
I can't do anything, nothing
just do something and one thing
Well, if I do one thing
I do everything
and I can't do everything
I can't even do this thing
for I do nothing.

So I'm trying to knit which I learned while I was in USA. I got back home try to do some knitting but I either doing pearl knit or knit stitch and have no idea how to pearl I just do. I don't even know what I am making so this is annoying. Or when I made cakes with my friend this week everything as to my perfect from measuring ingredients to arrange them when they go in the oven. 

Hope you like eiihter one of these poems, sorry it's a bit deep than normal.

No comments:

Post a Comment